My Top Ten TV Shows

This is my list of the Top Ten TV shows (as of now) and remember, this is my opinion, so don't go all crazy on me. I do suggest you watching these shows if you haven't already (especially number 4 and 5 on the list).
- no spoilers and in no specific order -
key: * made me tear up once ** a few times *** a LOT!!!

1. Freaks and Geeks - One of the few shows accurately depicting the teenage life in high school. It's set in the early 80's with a great cast of actors/actresses. An Apatow creation, so you know to expect some funny dialog. Many MANY memorable moments, especially the drumming audition. **



2. The Simpsons - Solid and brilliant cartoon and though it had its really low points, it's back on track. **



3. Futurama - I was against watching it at first, but from the first to last episode, "Futurama" has been consistently funny. **



4. Battlestar Galactica - A beautiful action-drama in space. It consists of creative cinematography, well-developed characters, an engaging musical score, and story-lines that'll keep you on the edge of your seat. I cannot stress enough how amazing this series is. Even if you're not a big sci-fi person, this show is definitely still incredible. I recently finished watching it and I'm already planning on re-watching it. ***

Here's the awesome opening scene to the series.


5. Six Feet Under - Another show I was skeptical at first, but the characters drive the story. Definitely the most emotional show I have ever watched. The show deals with all aspects of life and embraces the viewer into the characters' lives. The story is about a family that works and lives in a funeral home. Each episode opens with a death that eventually brings us to the funeral home. Make sure to watch it with a friend or a loved one, it'll make it a more memorable and enjoyable experience, plus you'll need someone to cry with. ********

Most of the random death scenes in the beginning are based off of real life stories.


6. Dexter - Such a wonderful and sick concept, how can you not love it? I think it's brilliant that the audience sympathizes with a serial killer. Keeps you guessing almost every episode. *

Opening credits


7. Arrested Development - Hands down (I hate that phrase), the funniest show I have ever seen. So many quick and subtle jokes and references made to earlier episodes, that it makes this show's replay value infinite. *

Very limited clips on youtube.


8. Extras - I don't think a show can get any more awkwardly funny than "Extras". Every episode stars a famous actor or actress playing an exaggerated or false version of themselves (e.g. Kate Winslet, Chris Martin, Ben Stiller, Orlando Bloom, and so on). Although the show is mainly awkward situations and hilarious dialog, there's an emotional value embedded into the main characters. * (Although it was once, it was a big one)

Insecure Orlando Bloom


9. The Office (UK Version) - Just like "Extras", the awkwardness is there, but only within the character of David Brent (Michael Scott's equivalent). A slower and more subtle office, but definitely just as funny and with more realistic written characters. *



10. Curb Your Enthusiasm - Larry David isn't afraid to speak his mind and that's what causes most of the conflicts his character faces in each episode. The negative thoughts we keep in our heads are the things that Larry David blurts out to make a point.



Honorable Mentions: South Park, Heroes, The X-Files, The Office (U.S. Version), 30 Rock, Tim and Eric Awesome Show (Great Job!).

Shows That I'm Planning to Watch: Deadwood, The Wire, Breaking Bad, the rest of Mad Men, Spaced, Band of Brothers, and True Blood.

Any suggestions?

AETP - Animals for the Ethical Treatment of People

I'm going to start my own organization like PETA, but for the people, BY THE PEOPLE!!! (slams fist down). It's about unethical treatment to humans by animals, like being stung by a jellyfish, a bear clawing a hippie-PETA camper, and even the little things like insect bites from asshole mosquitoes.

PETA's a non-profit organization, fuck that! Mine will be a profit organization (cha-ching!). How many times have you feared for your life on a peaceful hike only to be interrupted by a hissing snake or some animal with sharp fangs? You think to yourself, "Man, I don't need this shit, I got fat to burn, skylines to see, and a steak dinner waiting for me at home! Leave me alone scary animal!".

I'm not asking for $20, $10, or even a $1, but with $100, you can help animals from being cruel to you.

C.E.tothemuthaf-ingO. of AETP
Mustafa Sayed

Nightmares on my Back Street

I have nightmares every now and then, like once a month, but I realized that each one has something in common. Every time I wake up, I'm sleeping on my back!!! (DUN DUN DUNNNNN!!!). Now these nightmares aren't the ones where I forgot I was taking a class and missed 3/4 of the semester or that my teeth have fallen out, these nightmares are fucking HORRIFYING!!! The number one thing that make them so terrifying is that they feel 100% real. They were so bad that I was afraid to fall back asleep again thinking I'm going to continue these scary ass dreams. One time I woke up with my heart pounding out of my chest and I couldn't go back to sleep for hours.

I went online and found out that I'm not the only one who has nightmares when they sleep on their back. In most of these bad dreams, I'm physically paralyzed and that is a horrible, horrible, suffocating feeling that no one should ever experience.

A few nights ago, I woke up from a normal dream, but I was sleeping on my back and I immediately thought "Oh shit, gotta flip now!".

Gonna go to sleep now...on my stomach fo'sho!

Owwwwwweeeee

I was playing volleyball earlier and when I sprung up to hit the ball, I landed on my right big toe like a ballerina throwing her career away. Instead of the toe bending outward so the heel can follow, my toe bent inward, I fell into the fetal position, and let out a huge "FUCK!". I went home and iced it and it's already feeling better, but I gotta take it easy now :(

7 Days of Moustache Adventures

I always wanted to try out the mustache look but I was always hesitant, so I came up with the idea to take a vote on facebook. I wrote a status update saying, "if I get 30 'like's, I'll leave a mustache for a week", so if my mustache looks bad on me, the people are responsible for it, not me (muhahaha, twirls mustache in a very evil way). So as soon as I posted the status update, I had 5 "like"s in a minute and that's when I knew that I was in trouble. By the end up the day I had an overkill of 38 "like"s.

I'll admit, the attention was nice and I was excited to go through with it, but I had to wait a week for my facial hair to grow. When the day finally came, I shaved my beard and left the mustache. I was actually really digging the look, especially when I went to the shooting range. Holding a gun, sporting the v-neck, and borrowing my brother's aviator glasses felt so right. Then I went to the beach the following day and I felt like a dirty perverted pedophile. As the days went by, I was more and more embarrassed about the mustache and couldn't wait to finally shave it off.

Day 1 - Don't mess!

Day 2 - Hey there kids!

Day 3 - ¿Cómo estás?

Day 4 - His mustache is better kept =/

Day 5 - My Name is Earl

Day 6 - Feeling like a dirty guy again

Day 7 - Last day! Fackayouuuuu mustache!

Friday in Love

I thought this image (under the video) was fun and cute to look at while listening to the Cure's "Friday I'm In Love". Of course I'm starting to forget what all those feelings feel like, but it's nice to know some people are crazy in love.

Social Networking

After watching Julie and Julia, I was inspired to start blogging again, but this time, I don't want to make announcements via facebook or by having emails sent out every time I post a new blog. No one really knows I'm writing new blogs unless you happen to stumble upon it and I like that, mainly because it takes away the pressure to write. Earlier though, I saw that I had one new Google Buzz update and I clicked to check it, only to find out that it's posting my new blog entries, frack! (fixed)

I'm planning on becoming more active on twitter, updating my random and funny (or at least I think they are) thoughts. I'm just waiting for the twitter application on facebook to start working so my "tweets" go straight to facebook.

Anyways, this is all really only a fraction of my day, but it's like having a public diary (minus the cute book cover).

bye y'all!

Moose-tabolism

My metabolism is off the hook! As soon as I finish eating, I poop, it's crazy! It makes me think though, if I go out and pay for food, did I just pay to poop?

"I'll take a number 2, please"
"That'll be $6.50 for a number 2".

My dad made this dessert last night that consisted of half a bowl of chopped up strawberries, a scoop of yogurt, and with honey glazed all over it. At first I was like, "I don't knowwwwwww", but when I tried it I was like "Daaaaaaaamn, this is awesome!". The honey really made everything tastier, especially mixed in with the yogurt.

I've been coming up with my own food creations lately (in my head) and can't wait to learn more about cooking. I want to be the cool dad that serves up his kids tasty and healthy food.

Humanoids

It's weird to me that everyone has their own visual perspective and not mine. I'll stare at a stranger and try to see what they're seeing as if it were my own eyes, wonder what happened earlier in their day, and what is going to happen at the end of it, because every person out there is the most important person in their life.

It is also weird that so many people aren't existing that could have existed. I could say that I wouldn't be here if my parents never met, which means, so many people aren't existing because certain people aren't meeting.

If everyone had a better understanding and appreciation for life, their own and others, the world would be a better place.

Supernuts

I recently and embarrassingly got my haircut at...(swallows pride)...Supercuts. In the hair salon business, Supercuts is the equivalent of eating at a McDonalds. Despite the popularity and negative image of this place, I'm usually pretty happy with my haircuts, unlike the feeling I get after eating a Big Mac.

This last time was different. I knew it before it happened, I sensed it. It was something in the air, the flow of the day, and the characters I came across, something was definitely off. I'm sitting in the waiting area and a father and his pissed off son come in for a haircut too and after putting their name down, the son's like, "I'm gonna go to the Halloween store next door" and right when that happened I thought, "I'm going to get a bad haircut!".

Turns out that the haircut wasn't too bad, but not awesome either. The part that was off was the lady cutting my hair. I don't know if she's a character or she just lacks character.

It started when the receptionist walked by and my haircut lady said to the receptionist, "Oh yeah, I need to talk to you, I have stories to tell".

The kiss ass that I am to people making me food, washing my car, or in this case, cutting my hair, I decide to be funny and say, "I want to hear the stories too!". That's when the receptionist walked by again, placed her hand on my shoulder, and whispered, "trust me, she has a lot of stories" in a, "you're a fucking idiot, good luck digging yourself out of this hole" way.

So haircut lady is in her mid to late 40s, black poofy hair, and can pass as a fish. Her first story starts off with a night out at Acapulco for margaritas.

Haircut Lady: So I was having margaritas with some friends and then they (Acapulco workers) come out with a cake singing "Happy Birthday" to me and it's not even my birthday. I told them as a joke, but they believed me.

I thought the story was going somewhere, but I should expect less from fish lady.

Haircut Lady: I like Acapulco, it's a nice place. I can always go there. The bartender always gets happy when I show up. One time I asked for ten Coronas and he started to actually take ten out and I was like, "No, I was just kidding". It was so funny that he believed me.

Oh my GOD!! Why are you creating these boring visuals in my head!? You're rotting my brain more than tv.

Haircut Lady: Acapulco usually closes at ten and one night I told the bartender that we're going to stay till midnight and his face looked like, how do you say, pooped in his clothes?

Me: ...shit his pants??

Haircut Lady: Yeah, like he shit his pants, but I was kidding.

Instead of band camp, it was Acapulco for this lady. It was sad and it was painful to listen to. Next time I'm going to shut my mouth so whoever's cutting my hair can concentrate on my hair and not daydream about cute bartenders and remembering just-kidding moments gone wrong in their life.

If she reads this blog, she'll think, "This haircut lady sounds awesome, I should go have margaritas with her at Acapulco!".

San Francisco Trippin'

I'm sitting in front of my laptop on a fold out bed, in Newark, CA, where I just paid $5.95 to access the internet for 24 hours (about 25 cents an hour). To make the situation slightly uncomfortable, I am tonguing the loose tissue from the roof of my mouth as I had just burnt it earlier.

My morning started at 6:45am as my brain decided to wake me up 15 minutes before my alarm (stupid brain!). I finished packing and got ready, then picked up our rental car for our family trip out to Northern California. My parents had to go for a wedding in Hayward and so my brother and I decided to join them, but instead of the wedding, my brother and I decided to go to San Francisco. We decided to take the longer, yet well-worth scenic route, and planned a stop in Solvang. Solvang was very nice and clean, all that was missing was some snow. We stopped by a jewelry shop so that my mom can look at their selection. The lady-worker kept mentioning that the jewelry's expensive because they're hand-crafted by Native Americans! So can you imagine how expensive they'd be if they were hand-crafted out of Native Americnas? Cha-ching!!!



We were on a time crunch, so we had to eat and leave as soon as possible. We went to a popular breakfast/brunch place there called "Paula's Pancake House". Their food was great and good enough for my picky parents to eat.

My Omelette


Everyone's Food


About two hours away from our destination, we had to stop for gas, and while waiting I saw a great opportunity for a picture of my parents, so I ran to the car and busted out my flash unit and umbrella.



My brother and I dropped off our parents at the wedding and we headed to San Francisco. We were pretty hungry and walked around a lot looking for somewhere to eat, but most of the places were closed and if it was open, it didn't look too appetizing. We gave up and got back in the car and headed to the banquet hall of the wedding and saw a Jack in the Box a few hundred feet away. We ordered our long-awaited food and as soon as my teeth bit into that stuffed jalapeño, the fire temperature of the jalapeño burnt the roof of my mouth.

Thanks for reading and if you're reading this through your email, please click on the "Cloud Cuckoo" link to see the full content with the pictures I've added.

The Lonely Lady

It was winter last year when I first encountered the lonely lady and I've had two additional sightings since.

I met up with a group of friends last year at BJ's restaurant for appetizers and beer, so we sat at the high tables of the bar. Across from me were the booths and that's when I saw one of the saddest sights I've ever seen. There was this old lady hunched over her food, sitting alone in the booth, asleep. I felt bad catching other people staring at her, but I was obviously guilty of this as well. I don't know how else to explain it, but it was absolutely depressing on so many levels. I had a billion thoughts simultaneously pass through my mind trying to figure out what led her here, alone and asleep.

I imagined the lonely lady when she was first brought into the world, her parents at the hospital as her mother is holding her newborn baby daughter, smiling, envisioning a bright future, a great life. She learns to walk, learns to speak, goes to school, plays tag, makes friends, vacations with the family, graduates, falls in love, and fast forward all that to this very moment, where she's sitting alone and asleep. I could be wrong or right about her past, but I'll never know, and I'll always wonder.

I saw her at In-N-Out once before and I saw her again tonight and again, she was sleeping both times. I glanced at her table and saw an empty tray with scraps, a newspaper, a ziplock bag full of items, and hand sanitizer. I'm happy to know she eats, that she can afford to eat, and that she keeps herself busy reading. On my way out she was awake, packing up, and cleaning the table, so she's either considerate or has o.c.d. or both.

Now I know I can be totally wrong about everything and that I shouldn't even pity her, because she could be absolutely happy the way she is, but again, I don't know if she is or isn't. Even though she seemed like the loneliest person there, in a crowd full of teenagers and adults lost in life, the lonely lady was definitely not the loneliest.

I Know, Right?!?!

Anybody else notice the uprising popularity of the phrase, "I know, right?". It's so subtle and contains everyday words, that it can easily swoosh over your head, but once you start noticing it, you start looking at these people differently and think, "are you a zombie cult member!?". I want to grab these people by their shoulders and start shaking them, yelling, "WAKE UP! IT'S ME, MUSTAFA!!! STOP SAYING THIS SHIT!" (slappy slap across the face for you zombie cult member).

If you use this phrase, it doesn't mean that I don't like you, but I do wonder about the day you caught the I-Know-Right?-Disease (IKRD). It's usually said with a smile and it has the same arrangement of musical notes.

Such a random blog...
...I know right?

A Love Lost

I’m back on the market ladies, yay! (Sarcastic twirl with my index finger followed by a roll of the eyes). The way I feel right now is the way the lady with the sideburns, and basically everybody at table nine felt when Adam Sandler sang, “Love Stinks” in the Wedding Singer.

My heart aches throughout the day, but peaks before I sleep and when I first wake up. I’ve dealt with physical loneliness the last two years being in a long distance relationship (thank you for being there, right hand) and now I’m dealing with mental loneliness.

I decided to share this with you all, because in some form or other, you know how I feel. It sucks doesn’t it? I’ll be fine in the end, it’ll be a learning experience, mountains will collide, birds will poop out rainbows, blah blah blah, I know.

I was totally one of those people in a relationship that looked at a struggling couple and thought, “Must suck for them, they need to be more like us, right honey? Honey? Where are you!???” Now I’m one of those that I criticized, shit!

I’m staying positive and I’m not beating myself up over it, I’m just beating up other people over it, so it works out perfectly. The hardest part are the little associations that remind you of them. True story, I got really sad putting on my shorts this morning, like super duper sad, because I remembered when I went shopping with her to buy those shorts, so here I am standing in my room with my shorts half way up to my knees being really sad and in my head I’m thinking, “I should be laughing right now”, but instead I just stood there looking like a rape victim (that’s a messed up metaphor).

Joking aside, I am already learning a lot from this break-up and I’m learning to put myself first before anything else. I don’t know what the future will hold for me and Lara, but I know we will be in each other’s lives for sure.

Some Thoughts...

It's 3:38am right now and I'm in a sleepy, delusional mood, so I decided to write.

I don't know if my tolerance for people have lowered or that people are just becoming more choke-able. My brother often wishes he was superman (not because he's mentally retarded), but so that he can pick up the useless people in the world and chuck them out of this planet. Although I strongly agree with this fantasy, I think there are better ways to deal with these dead-weights. I can't really think of anything funny to add, so I'm going to stop trying and discontinue the negativity.

I'm super starving right now. I want a sandwich with a fuckfull amount of avocado and cheese in it. I can't really satisfy that craving because it's late and I don't have convenience access to it. I will try my best to dream up that sandwich.

Speaking of dreams, I usually have to wake up around 7am to pee, it sucks! It's really common for me to dream that I used the bathroom, but then a minute later, realize that I haven't gone yet and then I have a second dream that I used the bathroom, and again, realize that I haven't gone yet. When I finally wake up, I'm flooded in my own pee........but when I finally do wake up and go, it's such a wonderful feeling, especially when you have more time to sleep.

The worst though is when your bladder wakes you between that 10-20 minute time frame before your alarm, I think, "I could have been sleeping those extra twelve minutes!!! I know, I'll quickly go pee, go back to bed, and sleep for the remaining 11 minutes". Then 10 minutes later I finally fall asleep and a minute later, stupid alarm goes off being the stupid alarm that it is.

After all that sleep talk, I am now ready to sleep.

Look Ma! I'm flying! Weeeeee

I am waiting to get picked up to get dropped off at LAX for my flight to Virginia. This will be the very first time that I'll be flying with someone I know (my gf) and not alone (like a loser!). I am more excited about the flight than anything else, strange.

"What are you so darn excited about?" you ask?

I'm excited to chat, to have her nap with her head on my shoulder. I am excited to share my trail mix and beef jerky (wooo!). I brought a two-way splitter so we can use two earphones in one jack to watch a movie together. I'm excited to watch a movie together and listen to music.

My sleep schedule's already pretty messed up, but after this flight to VA, it's going to be so out of whack, that I'm going to use the phrase, "out of whack".

I'm starting to feel really good and confident about the near future. My friend just offered me a sales position at her work, I'm getting asked by different people for paid photo gigs, and I'm feeling healthier than ever.

I feel like life is waves after waves of filtering out friends and it never stops; you never know which friend will turn out to be the next jerk-face or which weirdo will turn out to be your best friend. Although you lose friends in the process, it's nice to make new friends, it's like washing out the brown stain from your underwear.

Okay, my ride's almost here :)

BYE!!!

Damn Drivers!!!

I had a terrible driving day today. I was seconds away from becoming the Incredible Hulk (I wish). I experienced two of the three different types of bad drivers: First was the super duper slow lady. I experienced the stupid slow lady three times in one trip (each a different stupid lady). I try not to honk, but by the time I was stuck behind the third lady, I slammed my palm against the steering wheel, which unfortunately made no noise; perfect opportunity missed! argh!!

Then earlier tonight, one of those, who think they're professional nascar racing, Fast and Furious imitating, fuck faces, zoomed in and out of my lane in front of me, trying to race his way home before his parents beat the living shit out of him for borrowing their car.

There must be some personality test taken along with the driving test. There are so many incapable, cuntable, and irresponsible drivers out there. I want to rip their hearts out and wash their windshield by using their heart as a sponge.

The third type that I cannot stand are the bad left turn makers. I'd be in the left lane and the street perpendicular to where I'm at have left turn makers coming inches away from hitting my car, because they don't have to stay within the lines.

So frustrating!

Goodbye and Hello

Goodbye
It's been a while. I've been hiding. I've been hiding in shame. "Why?" you ask? I got myself and others excited about the kitten, you know, the one I blogged about, the one I had people take a poll to decide his name.

It was Friday last week and I had all my cat necessities, ready to welcome him to his new home. I picked the kitty up from my friend, Amy, who works at a pet hospital and was taking care of four stray kittens at her own home. She helped me so much through the whole process and I'm very thankful for everything she's done. When I drove back home, I let Yoshi (I settled with that name) out of the carrier and into the kitchen. He slowly crept out, smelling every inch of the floor, wondering what is this middle-eastern smelling place.

Long story short: he was adorable, he was friendly, and he was a kitten. I don't think I was ready to take care of kitten, nor were my parents. I was too eager to have a pet that I didn't think of the responsibilities that it came with. It didn't help that it shot out diarrhea everywhere in the house. It also didn't help that his diarrhea smelled a million times worse than human diarrhea. Even when he'd rarely walk to the litter box, he'd settle in the litter, then stick his butt outside of the litter box and literally shoot diarrhea everywhere, shoot! I was trying to adjust to the new change in the house, but my mom wasn't having it, at all. It was ultimately her decision on rather he stays or he goes and away he went. I felt bad, I missed him, but no one was ready for him and for some reason, we thought we were.

Hello
On a brighter note, my girlfriend is finally coming home from Virginia for the summer and I'm super duper, diarrhea pooper, excited!!! Being in a long distance relationship is like visiting the food sampler lady every weekend at the market. Not only do you have to wait every weekend for her, but when she's finally there, she gives you so little. Lara's my food sampler lady. Sorry for the most retarded analogy in the world. With video chat and constant communication on the phone, it really helps with the distance. What does suck is that our time together always has a beginning and end. Like, yeah she's coming today, but I'm already dreading when she has to leave; bye bye food sampler lady lara :(

"Good morning, and in case I don't see ya, good afternoon, good evening, and good night!"
- Truman Burbank

Magic Bathrooms and Kitty Cats

My peak of creativity takes place either on the toilet or in the shower. On the toilet, it's like I'm shitting out life's worries and flushing them away, and in the shower, I'm in absolute peace. The water from the shower head acts as this warm protective armor, making me feel safe and at my maximum pure-tential (purity+potential). I really begin to figure out life, but as soon as all the soap's washed off, I'm like, "ehhhh, life's answer can wait. Back to the crazy world" (as I tie my cape around my neck).

Seriously though, if you need epiphanies, take a long ass shower. Maybe you'll have an epiphany on how to conserve water by not taking long ass showers.

So I'll be adopting a kitten this week (about 7 weeks old) and I'm super excited (and I just can't hide it). I'm having great difficulty coming up with a name for him, but it's also fun that I get to name him. So far, these are the options:

- Simba (because my name sounds like "Mufasa")
- Butters - South Park
- Spaghetti - from ATHF
- Yoda - Star Wars
- Yoshi - Super Mario Brothers
- Bjork - Bjork

You're probably thinking "WTF?", right? I'm trying not to give it a generic cat name or a human name and yes, "Bjork" is not a human name, she's not human, but she is an amazing artist. Help me out with this one; what do you guys prefer or suggest? Hopefully these picture help.

The Best Damn Sauce in the World

Another Trader Joe's plug, but I can't help it, they're amazing! I was at Trader Joe's about two weeks ago shopping for the usual: avocado, cheese, milk, and I also decided to pick up a bag of sweet potato fries. I got everything I intended to buy, but then I thought, "I can't have sweet potato fries with plain ol' ketchup or hot sauce, I need something that won't dominate in flavor, but instead compliment the fries", and that's when I came to the column of sauces and saw the stir fry sauce and I knew...I knew, that this was the one. I stood there staring at it, awing at it's beauty, daring myself to touch it as if it was some fragile historical artifact. The very moment my finger tips made contact with the bottle, I envisioned my many delicious moments with this sauce.


Were my preconceived assumptions correct? Hell freaking yes they were. You can practically have this with anything: Chicken, fries, fish, vegetables, rice, beef, and yes, even ice cream. Do yourself, family, and friends a favor and pick up this amazing sauce from Trader Joe's.