My metabolism is off the hook! As soon as I finish eating, I poop, it's crazy! It makes me think though, if I go out and pay for food, did I just pay to poop?
"I'll take a number 2, please"
"That'll be $6.50 for a number 2".
My dad made this dessert last night that consisted of half a bowl of chopped up strawberries, a scoop of yogurt, and with honey glazed all over it. At first I was like, "I don't knowwwwwww", but when I tried it I was like "Daaaaaaaamn, this is awesome!". The honey really made everything tastier, especially mixed in with the yogurt.
I've been coming up with my own food creations lately (in my head) and can't wait to learn more about cooking. I want to be the cool dad that serves up his kids tasty and healthy food.
Saturday, April 17, 2010
Humanoids
It's weird to me that everyone has their own visual perspective and not mine. I'll stare at a stranger and try to see what they're seeing as if it were my own eyes, wonder what happened earlier in their day, and what is going to happen at the end of it, because every person out there is the most important person in their life.
It is also weird that so many people aren't existing that could have existed. I could say that I wouldn't be here if my parents never met, which means, so many people aren't existing because certain people aren't meeting.
If everyone had a better understanding and appreciation for life, their own and others, the world would be a better place.
It is also weird that so many people aren't existing that could have existed. I could say that I wouldn't be here if my parents never met, which means, so many people aren't existing because certain people aren't meeting.
If everyone had a better understanding and appreciation for life, their own and others, the world would be a better place.
Friday, October 9, 2009
Supernuts
I recently and embarrassingly got my haircut at...(swallows pride)...Supercuts. In the hair salon business, Supercuts is the equivalent of eating at a McDonalds. Despite the popularity and negative image of this place, I'm usually pretty happy with my haircuts, unlike the feeling I get after eating a Big Mac.
This last time was different. I knew it before it happened, I sensed it. It was something in the air, the flow of the day, and the characters I came across, something was definitely off. I'm sitting in the waiting area and a father and his pissed off son come in for a haircut too and after putting their name down, the son's like, "I'm gonna go to the Halloween store next door" and right when that happened I thought, "I'm going to get a bad haircut!".
Turns out that the haircut wasn't too bad, but not awesome either. The part that was off was the lady cutting my hair. I don't know if she's a character or she just lacks character.
It started when the receptionist walked by and my haircut lady said to the receptionist, "Oh yeah, I need to talk to you, I have stories to tell".
The kiss ass that I am to people making me food, washing my car, or in this case, cutting my hair, I decide to be funny and say, "I want to hear the stories too!". That's when the receptionist walked by again, placed her hand on my shoulder, and whispered, "trust me, she has a lot of stories" in a, "you're a fucking idiot, good luck digging yourself out of this hole" way.
So haircut lady is in her mid to late 40s, black poofy hair, and can pass as a fish. Her first story starts off with a night out at Acapulco for margaritas.
Haircut Lady: So I was having margaritas with some friends and then they (Acapulco workers) come out with a cake singing "Happy Birthday" to me and it's not even my birthday. I told them as a joke, but they believed me.
I thought the story was going somewhere, but I should expect less from fish lady.
Haircut Lady: I like Acapulco, it's a nice place. I can always go there. The bartender always gets happy when I show up. One time I asked for ten Coronas and he started to actually take ten out and I was like, "No, I was just kidding". It was so funny that he believed me.
Oh my GOD!! Why are you creating these boring visuals in my head!? You're rotting my brain more than tv.
Haircut Lady: Acapulco usually closes at ten and one night I told the bartender that we're going to stay till midnight and his face looked like, how do you say, pooped in his clothes?
Me: ...shit his pants??
Haircut Lady: Yeah, like he shit his pants, but I was kidding.
Instead of band camp, it was Acapulco for this lady. It was sad and it was painful to listen to. Next time I'm going to shut my mouth so whoever's cutting my hair can concentrate on my hair and not daydream about cute bartenders and remembering just-kidding moments gone wrong in their life.
If she reads this blog, she'll think, "This haircut lady sounds awesome, I should go have margaritas with her at Acapulco!".
This last time was different. I knew it before it happened, I sensed it. It was something in the air, the flow of the day, and the characters I came across, something was definitely off. I'm sitting in the waiting area and a father and his pissed off son come in for a haircut too and after putting their name down, the son's like, "I'm gonna go to the Halloween store next door" and right when that happened I thought, "I'm going to get a bad haircut!".
Turns out that the haircut wasn't too bad, but not awesome either. The part that was off was the lady cutting my hair. I don't know if she's a character or she just lacks character.
It started when the receptionist walked by and my haircut lady said to the receptionist, "Oh yeah, I need to talk to you, I have stories to tell".
The kiss ass that I am to people making me food, washing my car, or in this case, cutting my hair, I decide to be funny and say, "I want to hear the stories too!". That's when the receptionist walked by again, placed her hand on my shoulder, and whispered, "trust me, she has a lot of stories" in a, "you're a fucking idiot, good luck digging yourself out of this hole" way.
So haircut lady is in her mid to late 40s, black poofy hair, and can pass as a fish. Her first story starts off with a night out at Acapulco for margaritas.
Haircut Lady: So I was having margaritas with some friends and then they (Acapulco workers) come out with a cake singing "Happy Birthday" to me and it's not even my birthday. I told them as a joke, but they believed me.
I thought the story was going somewhere, but I should expect less from fish lady.
Haircut Lady: I like Acapulco, it's a nice place. I can always go there. The bartender always gets happy when I show up. One time I asked for ten Coronas and he started to actually take ten out and I was like, "No, I was just kidding". It was so funny that he believed me.
Oh my GOD!! Why are you creating these boring visuals in my head!? You're rotting my brain more than tv.
Haircut Lady: Acapulco usually closes at ten and one night I told the bartender that we're going to stay till midnight and his face looked like, how do you say, pooped in his clothes?
Me: ...shit his pants??
Haircut Lady: Yeah, like he shit his pants, but I was kidding.
Instead of band camp, it was Acapulco for this lady. It was sad and it was painful to listen to. Next time I'm going to shut my mouth so whoever's cutting my hair can concentrate on my hair and not daydream about cute bartenders and remembering just-kidding moments gone wrong in their life.
If she reads this blog, she'll think, "This haircut lady sounds awesome, I should go have margaritas with her at Acapulco!".
Saturday, September 26, 2009
San Francisco Trippin'
I'm sitting in front of my laptop on a fold out bed, in Newark, CA, where I just paid $5.95 to access the internet for 24 hours (about 25 cents an hour). To make the situation slightly uncomfortable, I am tonguing the loose tissue from the roof of my mouth as I had just burnt it earlier.
My morning started at 6:45am as my brain decided to wake me up 15 minutes before my alarm (stupid brain!). I finished packing and got ready, then picked up our rental car for our family trip out to Northern California. My parents had to go for a wedding in Hayward and so my brother and I decided to join them, but instead of the wedding, my brother and I decided to go to San Francisco. We decided to take the longer, yet well-worth scenic route, and planned a stop in Solvang. Solvang was very nice and clean, all that was missing was some snow. We stopped by a jewelry shop so that my mom can look at their selection. The lady-worker kept mentioning that the jewelry's expensive because they're hand-crafted by Native Americans! So can you imagine how expensive they'd be if they were hand-crafted out of Native Americnas? Cha-ching!!!
We were on a time crunch, so we had to eat and leave as soon as possible. We went to a popular breakfast/brunch place there called "Paula's Pancake House". Their food was great and good enough for my picky parents to eat.
My Omelette
Everyone's Food
About two hours away from our destination, we had to stop for gas, and while waiting I saw a great opportunity for a picture of my parents, so I ran to the car and busted out my flash unit and umbrella.
My brother and I dropped off our parents at the wedding and we headed to San Francisco. We were pretty hungry and walked around a lot looking for somewhere to eat, but most of the places were closed and if it was open, it didn't look too appetizing. We gave up and got back in the car and headed to the banquet hall of the wedding and saw a Jack in the Box a few hundred feet away. We ordered our long-awaited food and as soon as my teeth bit into that stuffed jalapeño, the fire temperature of the jalapeño burnt the roof of my mouth.
Thanks for reading and if you're reading this through your email, please click on the "Cloud Cuckoo" link to see the full content with the pictures I've added.
Friday, September 25, 2009
The Lonely Lady
It was winter last year when I first encountered the lonely lady and I've had two additional sightings since.
I met up with a group of friends last year at BJ's restaurant for appetizers and beer, so we sat at the high tables of the bar. Across from me were the booths and that's when I saw one of the saddest sights I've ever seen. There was this old lady hunched over her food, sitting alone in the booth, asleep. I felt bad catching other people staring at her, but I was obviously guilty of this as well. I don't know how else to explain it, but it was absolutely depressing on so many levels. I had a billion thoughts simultaneously pass through my mind trying to figure out what led her here, alone and asleep.
I imagined the lonely lady when she was first brought into the world, her parents at the hospital as her mother is holding her newborn baby daughter, smiling, envisioning a bright future, a great life. She learns to walk, learns to speak, goes to school, plays tag, makes friends, vacations with the family, graduates, falls in love, and fast forward all that to this very moment, where she's sitting alone and asleep. I could be wrong or right about her past, but I'll never know, and I'll always wonder.
I saw her at In-N-Out once before and I saw her again tonight and again, she was sleeping both times. I glanced at her table and saw an empty tray with scraps, a newspaper, a ziplock bag full of items, and hand sanitizer. I'm happy to know she eats, that she can afford to eat, and that she keeps herself busy reading. On my way out she was awake, packing up, and cleaning the table, so she's either considerate or has o.c.d. or both.
Now I know I can be totally wrong about everything and that I shouldn't even pity her, because she could be absolutely happy the way she is, but again, I don't know if she is or isn't. Even though she seemed like the loneliest person there, in a crowd full of teenagers and adults lost in life, the lonely lady was definitely not the loneliest.
I met up with a group of friends last year at BJ's restaurant for appetizers and beer, so we sat at the high tables of the bar. Across from me were the booths and that's when I saw one of the saddest sights I've ever seen. There was this old lady hunched over her food, sitting alone in the booth, asleep. I felt bad catching other people staring at her, but I was obviously guilty of this as well. I don't know how else to explain it, but it was absolutely depressing on so many levels. I had a billion thoughts simultaneously pass through my mind trying to figure out what led her here, alone and asleep.
I imagined the lonely lady when she was first brought into the world, her parents at the hospital as her mother is holding her newborn baby daughter, smiling, envisioning a bright future, a great life. She learns to walk, learns to speak, goes to school, plays tag, makes friends, vacations with the family, graduates, falls in love, and fast forward all that to this very moment, where she's sitting alone and asleep. I could be wrong or right about her past, but I'll never know, and I'll always wonder.
I saw her at In-N-Out once before and I saw her again tonight and again, she was sleeping both times. I glanced at her table and saw an empty tray with scraps, a newspaper, a ziplock bag full of items, and hand sanitizer. I'm happy to know she eats, that she can afford to eat, and that she keeps herself busy reading. On my way out she was awake, packing up, and cleaning the table, so she's either considerate or has o.c.d. or both.
Now I know I can be totally wrong about everything and that I shouldn't even pity her, because she could be absolutely happy the way she is, but again, I don't know if she is or isn't. Even though she seemed like the loneliest person there, in a crowd full of teenagers and adults lost in life, the lonely lady was definitely not the loneliest.
Saturday, September 19, 2009
I Know, Right?!?!
Anybody else notice the uprising popularity of the phrase, "I know, right?". It's so subtle and contains everyday words, that it can easily swoosh over your head, but once you start noticing it, you start looking at these people differently and think, "are you a zombie cult member!?". I want to grab these people by their shoulders and start shaking them, yelling, "WAKE UP! IT'S ME, MUSTAFA!!! STOP SAYING THIS SHIT!" (slappy slap across the face for you zombie cult member).
If you use this phrase, it doesn't mean that I don't like you, but I do wonder about the day you caught the I-Know-Right?-Disease (IKRD). It's usually said with a smile and it has the same arrangement of musical notes.
Such a random blog...
...I know right?
If you use this phrase, it doesn't mean that I don't like you, but I do wonder about the day you caught the I-Know-Right?-Disease (IKRD). It's usually said with a smile and it has the same arrangement of musical notes.
Such a random blog...
...I know right?
Thursday, September 17, 2009
A Love Lost
I’m back on the market ladies, yay! (Sarcastic twirl with my index finger followed by a roll of the eyes). The way I feel right now is the way the lady with the sideburns, and basically everybody at table nine felt when Adam Sandler sang, “Love Stinks” in the Wedding Singer.
I decided to share this with you all, because in some form or other, you know how I feel. It sucks doesn’t it? I’ll be fine in the end, it’ll be a learning experience, mountains will collide, birds will poop out rainbows, blah blah blah, I know.
I was totally one of those people in a relationship that looked at a struggling couple and thought, “Must suck for them, they need to be more like us, right honey? Honey? Where are you!???” Now I’m one of those that I criticized, shit!
I’m staying positive and I’m not beating myself up over it, I’m just beating up other people over it, so it works out perfectly. The hardest part are the little associations that remind you of them. True story, I got really sad putting on my shorts this morning, like super duper sad, because I remembered when I went shopping with her to buy those shorts, so here I am standing in my room with my shorts half way up to my knees being really sad and in my head I’m thinking, “I should be laughing right now”, but instead I just stood there looking like a rape victim (that’s a messed up metaphor).
Joking aside, I am already learning a lot from this break-up and I’m learning to put myself first before anything else. I don’t know what the future will hold for me and Lara, but I know we will be in each other’s lives for sure.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
